I suck at complimenting people. Really, I’m not good at it. To anyone who’s ever received a compliment from me (you’re out there) I’m sorry (I never said anything about sucking at apologies). I think there’s an artistry to dishing out effective compliments, and unfortunately, it’s an artistry I know nothing about. That said, I’ve put some thought into the concept of lauding people and, I think, I’ve come to some interesting conclusions.

First, I’d like to point out that I don’t enjoy receiving praise. Alright, that’s probably a lie… I think everyone appreciates being appreciated, but I find it a tad awkward. What do you say to someone who displays a degree of interest in you? Thanks? What if they’re wrong? Do you still say thanks or do you point out that they are an ignorant fool who should not be afforded the privilege of speech (and if you do take that route… does that make you an asshole)? I don’t know, but approval makes me feel ill at ease, and puts too much pressure on me to continue being proficient at whatever it is I was commended on.

Now, being that I feel a little uncomfortable receiving praise, should I feel comfortable committing an act that would make me feel uncomfortable? I think not. Ergo, I don’t throw around compliments as if they were grenades… and I were in some sort of war… cuz who goes around chucking grenades as if they were compliments (aside from psychopaths… and I can’t really think of any psychos who do that either)?

Furthermore, compliments don’t necessarily send a positive message. Let’s, for example, say you (insert your name here… or just imagine that we’re talking about you… which is why I said you in the first place) are sitting around and some chick/dude walks over and shoots you a compliment… let’s keep it simple and imagine she/he says “You are gorgeous.” Awesome… right? Not necessarily bucko. Let’s think about this, shall we? An individual who is willing to walk up to you, and feed you some crap about you being gorgeous (which may not be crap… maybe you actually are attractive… I mean, this is the internet, aren’t we all?) probably considers her/himself to be somewhere in your league. Should this individual happen to be incredibly attractive, then the compliment works swimmingly and all is well… but if said individual happens to be less than desirable, she/he may be sending you a not so favorable message. What’s the message you ask? You aren’t really attractive at all! If the ugliest person in your vicinity thinks they’ve got a good shot at you, the compliment suddenly becomes more of an insult… and insults make poor compliments. So if I walk up to a girl and tell her she’s attractive, I may actually be insulting her, cuz maybe she’s out of my league.

You know that saying… the one about not saying anything should you have nothing nice to say? Well they should change that to “Don’t speak to people… cuz they may be out of your league.”

Recap:
I’m not a big fan of compliments;
Sometimes being nice is the cruelest joke you can play on someone;
Does being out of ones league still apply if you’re playing a different sport but happen to be housed in the same stadium?

Tell your friends nothing… unless you want to make them feel bad.

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